Aren't we all both good and bad?

I heard the term 'muhasibbah diri' (self reflection) on the radio some time ago. Being me, I often listen to the Muslim's Friday sermon on the radio as attentively as I listen to the priest's homily at church on Sundays because I know I always learn something from them. The imam said that we have to examine ourselves before saying bad things about others, as sometimes the bad things we say reflect our own weaknesses.


How true indeed. It is often easy to look at someone's negative traits especially when that someone is not very popular among the community members, or the colleagues. And as opposed to that, one tends to view a popular person always positively when in actual fact, that person may commit some crimes once in a while. It reminds me of something I read somewhere, that "most people are neither all good or all bad. Rather, most of us are in the middle of the two". I quite agree with that statement. In fact, I am extending it a bit more to say all of us are both good and bad. Of course, I have no backup in saying this. It's just a feeling. With this self-reflection, I hope I can remind myself all the time to look for people's positive traits even when I do not like them, or when they are not treating me right.


Well, I'll start with the grandmother next door, who scolded me yesterday for parking outside her gate :-) She lives alone, and after talking to her a few times, (mostly listening to her whine about how bad her relatives are), I made the wrong move of assuming that she didn't have any relatives with cars visiting her. Hence the occasional parking outside of her place. But ouch, I have taken things for granted a bit too much. Just as I flashed her a big smile when I stopped my car yesterday, she marched towards me and without a preamble, gave me a long lecture about not being such a nuisance by parking outside of other people's place. Because I parked there, her son had to park far away when visiting her a few days ago. Well I have only myself to blame this time. Even though she didn't give me a chance to apologise properly, at least by giving me that long lecture, she had been really honest. So one point for honesty for the grandmother. She might be grumpy, but she is such a good gardener. So two points for the grandmother...well well...one point for me for admitting my inconsiderate mistake...